notes on a previous life

i was not prepared for the


of becoming another person

the strange alienation from


to myself

adopting the second being

that had always

cowered deep inside

she was bold, brave, fearless

the opposite of my


charming, vibrant

a tease if ever there was

but genuine


with what people thought of


i never told her

she had to be


so she wasn’t

and never cared …

even after he found her

i thought the two of them

might have fun

wile away lonely hours far from home


making them not so forlorn

he became a part

of her definition

his heart

sutured onto my soul

he was beautiful because

he was real

so shockingly human

and tangible

but i had to break him

she couldn’t live


even though i never

wanted to look back

i wrote him a letter

when they said


she gave it him

in my handwriting

he learned she wasn’t real

jekyll killed hyde

or maybe it was the other way



i thought it had ended

i mourned my

what some might call


my playing by the rules

yet when i rested my

weary bones

on my own shores

in childhood’s house …

there he stood

oh so mockingly


a ghost of previous lives

come back to

haunt me


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