You could plant me like a tree beside a river
You could tangle me in soil and let my roots run wild
and i would blossom like a flower in the desert
but for now, just let me cry
You could raise me like a banner in the battle
and put victory (like a fire) behind my shining eyes
i would drift like falling snow over the embers
but for now, just let me lie
bind up these broken bones
Mercy, bend and breathe me back to life
but not before You show me how to die
set me like a star before the morning
like a song that steals the darkness from a world asleep
and i’ll illuminate the path You’ve laid before me
but for now, just let me be
let me go like a leaf upon the water
let me brave the wild currents flowing to the sea
and i will disappear into a deeper beauty
but for now, just stay with me …
God, for now, just stay with me
— audrey assad, the house You’re building, “show me”
a couple of weeks ago i was feeling … mm, shall we say fatalistic? about this whole upcoming surgery thing. and that’s when i discovered audrey assad and this song. you should look it up; it’s beautiful. i wish i could sing and write music the way she does.
but you know what? God is good. and i mean that. whatever He chooses to do, it’s far better than i deserve, and infinitely for my good. to remind me that “my life is hid with Christ on high, with Christ my Savior and my God,” to quote another favorite song.
also, dying is something that has to be a part of living every day. our old, sinful, rotten selves were crucified with Christ, but every day we have to choose freshly to follow Him, to die to our rebellious natures. i like that this song in that way has a double, or deepened, meaning.