“… I have already lost touch with a couple of people I used to be.” — Joan Didion, Slouching Toward Bethlehem
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All articles filed in memory
underneath
last september marked five years since my brain surgery. if it weren’t for the scar beneath my hair and the titanium plate in my skull, by now i might think it was all just another a strange dream. “scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real.” ― cormac mccarthy, all…
Read Moreremembering the future
i’ve lost a poem. this, i suppose, is the danger of composing most works online and then transferring them to computer file or paper later. it feels like having lost a friend or a treasured memory. actually, i wonder if i deleted it in a moment of panic. it described something i’d seen quite vividly…
Read Morewhat dreams
we were driving through a run-down downtown toward dusk, and the sky was an angry orangey-red, like charn when the sun was dying. you were taking me home. “home.” it was an old mill turned office building or apartments. home in these dreamscapes is rarely what it should be. or always what it can’t be.…
Read Moreoh hapless pie, and other thoughts
i try to do everything. but i don’t always do it well or the most efficiently. i take the long way ’round by accident. i get lost in too many thoughts at once and forget what my hands are supposed to be doing or my eyes are supposed to be watching. i choose the obscure…
Read Morethe authoress at 19
i decided to merge at old blog into this one just so i could keep a handle on everything. here’s how i described myself, my life and my future when i was 19 turning 20. i thought it was somewhat charming, despite myself. authoress i want to own a bookstore when i grow up. i…
Read Morewhere the music takes you
one aspect of having a vivid imagination is that it takes you a lot of interesting places — many of which, in fact, probably do not exist. have you been to babel yet? your version probably doesn’t look like mine. that’s okay. i would be a little scared if it did, actually. here’s what i…
Read Morebreach
i remember sewing you up into that wall brick by careless brick thinking a walling away would be equivalent to ripping out all my lazy stitching and starting again needle-pricked but clean i was hideously wrong i would like to forget all of that the aftermath the shock waves and the frustration in between it…
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summer of dreams
i have memories of idyllic childhood summers where i would run around barefoot in the backyard, having brave adventures and catching fireflies until dinnertime and dusk. i don’t remember feeling pained by prickles underfoot. i don’t remember humidity so thick it was stifling, air so close i couldn’t breathe. i know those things must have…
Read Moreremembering in music
one of my friends recently wrote a blog entry about music, and it inspired me to write one of my own. although not quite on the same subject. my parents and i went to lawrence, kansas, today. lawrence has lots of memories for all of us, but my most vivid and fond memories are related…
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